Death and funerals in the time of social distancing By: Brenda Suderman Posted: 7:00 PM CDT Wednesday, Mar. 18, 2020 Last Modified: 8:27 PM CDT Wednesday, Mar. 18, 2020 Updates

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This article was published 17/03/2020 (1702 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

In this era of social distancing, faith communities are bringing centuries-old rituals around death and grieving into the 21st century and limiting personal contact even though community support is an important part of these rituals.

High-tech solutions like livestreaming funerals and FaceTime family visits allow mourners to pay their respects and offer condolences while respecting protocols prohibiting large gatherings.

With that in mind, the family of the man immortalized on the big screen as the iconic Gus Portokalos decided to share his final farewells on small screens across the globe.

A private family funeral for Constantine (Gus) Nicholas Vardalos will be livestreamed from St. Demetrios Greek Orthodox Church at 11 a.m. on Thursday in order to minimize contact and comply with provincial guidelines discouraging large public gatherings.

“After careful consideration regarding the new COVID-19 crisis, and in the interest of the community’s health, the family has decided to postpone a memorial service to a later date to be announced,” the family wrote in Vardalos’s obituary. He died on March 12 at the age of 87.

Vardalos is the father of actor, screenwriter and producer Nia Vardalos, best known for her 2002 hit movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding, based on her own wedding in Winnipeg. Gus Vardalos was portrayed on screen by actor Michael Constantine.

Livestreaming offers mourners a chance to participate and gain some closure in a time when health protocols don’t allow large groups to congregate, said Mike Vogiatzakis of Voyage Funeral Homes, which is livestreaming Vardalos’s funeral.

“It probably would have been a massive funeral, so people can watch it live and it will also be on YouTube later,” he said, adding livestreaming options will be offered to all families arranging funerals right now.

Between social distancing and no gatherings of more than 50 people, Jewish customs around death and grieving are now scaled back to include only family members, said Rena Boroditsky, executive director of the Jewish funeral home Chesed Shel Emes.

“We are recommending graveside services with the immediate family only and not having a (community) meal,” she said.

Instead of shiva visits to the grieving family, Boroditsky suggests using email, FaceTime, and the telephone to express condolences, and conducting prayer services virtually.

“All of our burial and funeral and mourning rituals are based in community,” she said.

“It certainly will impact all of those rituals but it doesn’t mean we can’t do all we can.

“We still honour all the essential parts of the ritual.”

Muslims also gather for community prayers as part of their death rituals, but with local mosques closed, those prayers will take place graveside or at the funeral home, said Idris Elbakri, board chair of the Manitoba Islamic Association.

“Unfortunately, they (the funerals) are going to become very minimal,” he said.

If possible, Jews and Muslims bury bodies within 24 hours of death. Neither tradition embalms bodies but washes and prepares them according to specific rituals.

Anglicans are encouraged to postpone memorial services for family members if possible or hold small services with only the priest and immediate family attending, said Bishop Geoffrey Woodcroft of Diocese of Rupert’s Land.

“We’re not touching caskets, we’re hands off, but we’ll perform the ceremony,” he said, adding that no funeral lunches will be allowed.

Anglican church buildings in the diocese were closed as of Monday, March 16.

Roman Catholics are also encouraged to scale down funerals, said Archbishop Richard Gagnon, adding Winnipeg’s Catholic bishops will release new protocols around public gatherings and religious rituals later this week.

“To delay the funeral, no, but (we encourage families) to reduce the size of the funeral to comply with health authorities,” said Gagnon, Archbishop of Winnipeg.

Chesed Shel Emes’ Main Street location is closed for construction and all body preparation has moved to a dedicated space at Chapel Lawn Funeral Home. Muslims expect to complete their body washing facility at the Grand Mosque by late spring, and now use facilities at Cropo Funeral Home.

brenda@suderman.com

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