Gene Simmons has a key to the city? So does Shannen Doherty.

Opinion

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 16/06/2011 (4899 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

Judging by what I was reading yesterday, people were either upset, baffled, and even angry about Gene Simmons receiving a “Key to the City” of Winnipeg. I did some digging around for a list of those who have received a similar honour so I could compare if Gene was indeed worthy when compared to those who have previously received “The Key”. (It used to be called the “Honorary Citizen Scroll”. Same type of thing. The “Key” to the City is new-ish)

Joan Rivers (Honorary Citizen 1997) vs. Gene Simmons (2011)

From what I know about Joan Rivers she has a foul mouth and pokes fun at people’s clothes. Gene Simmons has a mouth featuring a long tongue and a fashion sense that includes huge boots and massive shoulder pads. Both wear roughly the same amount of make up. People find Joan Rivers funny, people think Kiss rocks. We’ll score this one a draw.

Shannen Doherty (Hon. Citizen 2002) vs. Gene Simmons (2011)

I remember meeting Shannen Doherty when she was here in ‘02. She seemed pleasant. I also remember trying my hardest not to call her Brenda. While Doherty starred on, depending on your age, one of the greatest shows of all-time in 90210, I don’t recall much else about her. I also don’t recall any objection to her being named an Honorary Citizen of Winnipeg. So, while BH 90210 is great and Charmed was ok… Gene Simmons wrote “Calling Doctor Love”, which is awesome. Winner: Gene Simmons.

Homer J. Simpson (Hon. Citizen 2003) vs. Gene Simmons (2011)

Yes, in 2003, when it was believed that Simpson’s creator Matt Groening father (Homer Groening) was born in Manitoba, we decided to jump all over it and make Homer J. Simpson an Honorary Citizen. There ended up being some question as to the actual birthplace, with Saskatchewan being floated around as a more likely place of birth for the real Homer, but whatever. I’ve heard “Winnipeg” referenced far more times on one of the greatest shows in history than I’ve heard “Saskatchewan”. I’ve also heard Gene Simmons say “Winnipeg”… but it was always followed by an order to “make some noise!”. He says that to every city. Winner: Homer Simpson.

Supertramp (Hon. Citizens 1979) vs. Gene Simmons (2011)

I’ll be honest, I had to google Supertramp. Turns out I know a bunch of their songs. They were the band with that guy with the fairly high voice that sang “Dreamer”. I was about to give this one to Gene, until further searches led me to “Breakfast in America”, also by Supertramp. Awesome song. I now like Supertramp. I also, however, like “Deuce” and “Plaster Caster” by Kiss… so I’m scoring this one a draw.

Sarah, Duchess of York (Hon. Citizen 1997) vs. Gene Simmons (2011)

Poor Fergie. She’s had a rough ride. Never really fit in anywhere. She’s done some great charity work, but will now forever be remembered for trying to sell access to Prince Andrew to News of the World for 1 million dollars. Not good. Gene takes money from people as well, but he’s very clear and upfront about it. Winner: Gene Simmons.

Like you, I’m not 100% sure how awarding a key to our city is decided upon… but the list is long. Most are highly worthy. Others, like Gene Simmons, prompt some questions. Here are a few more who have received the honour in Winnipeg over the years.

Vince McMahon, WWE, 1995

Garth Brooks, 1993

Doug Henning, magician, 1986

Mickey Mouse, mouse, 1986

Donald Duck, duck, 1984

Zsa Zsa Gabor, famous lady, 1981

Bob Newhart, comedian, 2004

Dan Akroyd, actor, 1996

Peter Nygard, fashion guy, 2008

Rowdy Roddy Piper, wrestler, 2006

Steve Fonyo, runner, 1985