The day I ditched the heels

Hey there, time traveller!
This article was published 16/12/2021 (1008 days ago), so information in it may no longer be current.

It’s been a long pandemic, and I believe that between March 2020 and the beginning of November 2021, when my synagogue began cautious in-person services again on Saturday mornings, I had worn my high heels maybe once or twice. Not a lot of occasions to get dressed up, alas.

If you’ve never seen me in person, I’m short. So it’s not surprising that high-heeled shoes have been part of my outfit for many years, although thankfully never on a daily basis. I thought they were fun and pretty, made my legs look sexier, made me look taller and more imposing, etc. I wore them on any occasion that called for a nice dress. My feet hurt afterwards but, after all, we must “suffer to be beautiful”, right? That’s just how it is.

Like all of us, I’ve been on a journey for the past couple of years, and have been giving a lot of thought to the weighty questions of who I am and what I want to achieve in this world. With my 60th birthday fast approaching, the truth is I probably have less time ahead of me than behind me.

With this in mind, I have been choosing to abandon behaviours and choices that don’t bring me joy, to quote the great Marie Kondo.

One of those was makeup — if you’ve seen any of my recent videos, you may have noticed that I am not hiding behind a mask. I take care of my skin, of course, but I have chosen not to decorate it. I still colour my hair, since that does bring me joy. Who said we had to be consistent?

This past Saturday morning, as I got ready for synagogue, I debated the shoes. I love how they make me look. I despise how they make me feel — slow, just a little unsteady in my gait. My legs may look sexy, but they don’t feel powerful. What is more important to me? Would I become an invisible, little old lady if I didn’t suffer to be beautiful? I had to find out.

The opposite of high heels is not ugly clompers. I pulled on a pair of cute little ballet slippers, and my feet felt infinitely better. I could walk with purpose and power and still feel well-dressed. Nobody looked past me because I was a few inches shorter.

This may appear to be a small and trivial matter, but in many ways it’s huge. I feel like I am reclaiming my power, step by step.

How about you, what behaviours are you leaving behind these days? 

Hadass Eviatar is a community correspondent for West Kildonan. Check out her blog at: http://hadasseviatar.com/blog/